The First Time I Felt Completely Alone

No one told me how lonely early motherhood can feel, after my daughter was born, everyone came to visit. There were flowers, meals dropped off, messages every day asking how we were going.
But after a few weeks, life moved on for everyone else and suddenly it was just me and a tiny baby in the house all day.
One afternoon she had been crying for what felt like hours. Nothing I was doing was working.
I remember sitting on the floor holding her and crying too because I genuinely thought I was doing everything wrong and I had no idea what to do. I remember thinking, maybe I don't have a natural mum instinct, maybe my baby doesn't like me, I just felt like every other mum must know what they’re doing and I was the only one who didn’t.

That night, when my husband finally walked through the door, I told him I didn’t think I was cut out for motherhood. He didn’t try to talk me out of it or tell me what I should be doing differently. He just held our daughter and said, “You’re the best mum she could possibly have.”

At the time, I couldn’t take it in. I was too tired, too overwhelmed, too unsure and kind of annoyed at him that he didn't say much more.

But now my daughter is three. She runs to me when she’s hurt, when she’s tired, when she’s excited, when she wants to show someone something she’s proud of. I’m the person she looks for first and it’s only now looking back, that I realise something. Even on the days I felt completely lost, even when I thought I was doing everything wrong, we were learning each other. We were figuring it out together, one long day at a time.

Early motherhood can be incredibly lonely, even when you’re never technically “alone.” But feeling unsure doesn’t mean you’re not a good mum. It just means you’re human, and you’re doing something new and enormous and life‑changing.

And somehow, even in the messiest moments, you and your baby find your way. If you are a new mum reading this, I promise you, you will find your way.

- Stace, VIC